Does anyone else deal with this? I constantly have intrusive thoughts regarding past manic episodes wherein I did extremely uncharacteristic actions / acted in incredibly bizarre and embarrassing ways. the worst example of this was when I basically had a full on public meltdown that lasted 2 days. It makes me feel very bad about myself and distracts me from concentrating on whatever task Im working on at a particular time.

I've been trying to find a therapist to go to to discuss some of these negative self-thoughts and feelings but so far I haven't been able to find one in my area who is accepting new patients. I try to send out a couple of emails to local Ts every week but so far I've had no luck.