Ok... and I've done that too. If you're crazy then you're not alone I think I mentioned that I am an introvert and feel perfectly fine alone but I'm also comfortable in social situations. In between bouts of MI I have had a very full and active life. Sometimes I would live a bit too fast to make up for lost time. I hope you don't mind me sharing... I'm not trying to make it about me. Sometimes when people say something it makes me reflect and get an insight into something in my past. I think most people probably examine events or conversations and think of ways they could have done better... something they could have said or something they could have done differently. But living a parallel fantasy life or constantly questioning your actions isn't healthy either.
Part of this just sounds like fantasizing and there is nothing inherently bad or abnormal about fantasizing. I don't fantasize much anymore. I miss it a bit. Would you feel comfortable talking about some of these scenarios?