I miss arguing with him about whether we can do away with notions of 'moral responsibility' and the like and still have a workable legal and psychiatric system.
I miss us bemoaning the tradition of highly analytical philosophy.
I miss parts of his anatomy that I won't get into...
I miss his smiling eyes.
I miss his furrowed brow.
I miss his running up mountains.
I miss having to stretch out as far as I can to reach the bottom of his chin.
Sigh.

I worry that I'm forgetting what he looks like.
I worry that he will stop missing me.
I worry that he will meet someone else.
I worry that he will move on with his life and forget about me.
:-(
I worry that circumstances will conspire against us and we won't get to be together again.
I worry that I'll go down in his life story as a fling.
Maybe... A regretable fling.

I worry that I'm too %#@&#! up to be able to do healthy relationships.
I worry that I'm too clingy
I worry that I'm too closed
I worry that I'm unreliable
I worry that I push and pull
I worry that he will get sick of me
I worry that he will feel like he is looking after a little kid and that he doesn't want to look after a little kid
I worry that I'm not capable of a reciprocal relationship.

He told me that he knows I'm complicated and that having a relationship with me will be complicated...
But he is doing it anyway.
He told me that he sees a t and he tells me a bit about that...
He has hang ups too...

I just miss him so much. My secure base. My happiness inside. How long will his effect on me last? Will it go away over time so his presence doesn't make me feel this way? Is this an idealisation just waiting to turn into a devaluation?

I miss his social gregariousness.
I miss his social skills
I miss his ability to make me feel safe and part of groups
I miss his encouraging me to socialise more and being with me when we are having a good time.

I miss his boundaries.
I miss his telling me 'no'
I miss his respect for me and his checking I feel the same way in the morning before taking things to the next level
I miss his responsibility
I miss his respect for me making sure I'm not going to end up feeling used
I miss his telling me 'no'

Er... It is about his respect for me? Not about his having sexual hang ups or anything? I don't think it is... He was not going to kiss me after I told him I needed to slow things down and said I didn't think we should kiss... Then we went out and I got drunken and wanted to kiss him that night... And he wouldn't. Said we should wait and see whether I felt the same way the next day. And I did. And it was okay then. It was okay then. So... It is about respect. ? I think... I've never met anybody like that before... Self restraint... Amazing... I miss him so much...

I miss him quite a lot.
Sigh.

Miss you Mr Man :-(