Sounds healthy, for you.

What I was trying to say in my brief comment earlier was that it really does sound like you had a legitimately difficult situation with your parents and lack of other family growing up. Not to label or try to stigmatize her in any way, because I have a great deal of “empathy”? “sympathy”? I’m not sure which, for other people with PD’s, but have you considered that your mother may have one? (Maybe BPD?) Which means that you are certainly at risk for difficulties yourself, especially combined with the early loss of your father.

At any rate, even if you love your mother, her life and mental health are primarily her problem. And that really sucks because I think the mental health profession often has very little of a clue what to do, especially for people who don’t have a clue to start with either. But that’s another topic.

So. . . what can you, perhaps, do for yourself mental-health wise? And given the can of worms you might get into, what do you want to try to do for yourself and your life, potentially? Are you in therapy currently? Or have you been in therapy before?

I say that therapy can be a can of worms because that has certainly been my experience and if you look on the Psychotherapy forum, it seems to have been the experience of quite a few others. Nevertheless. . .it can be worthwhile sometimes, too.

Whoa on some of this -- just happened to notice your thread in "Layoffs, Recession and the Economy". A lot of your situation could easily come from the fact that you are a young adult in the phase of life where you are (still) just starting to make a life for yourself and define who you are, so some of these issues may clear up on their own. . . though, as I said, with the "risk factors" for your own mental health, if you could see someone it might be worthwhile. Could make getting out and on your own easier, too, but there's probably some anxiety about all of that? Also sounds like you and your mother are very different, you may need your own place, probably not going to happen right away, I can understand if you feel frustration and uncertainty.