I know how you feel. I get very explosive emotional outbursts around my boyfriend, often set off from something very small, or like you said, I can't even pinpoint the cause. I could be yelling/being snappy at him all I want, but as soon as he retorts in an equal manner, I become super hurt and can't stop thinking about it for a long time. I had a huge meltdown on the way to my pdoc visit in December. It was quite hysterical for anyone watching, I will admit, but I was so angry, stressed, and overall I felt as though my boyfriend was so terrible for not knowing which way the clinic was (it was our first time going). I even at one point said "bye" and started walking across the street away from him. He usually does not react to my behavior which makes me angrier because I feel like he's ignoring me. I know how messed up it is and I have yet to go to therapy for this due to money complications. I hope you're able to go to therapy for this soon. People may view us as awful people but really we can hardly get a grasp on our emotions on our own.