There's nothing unnatural or wrong about being a little gun-shy after having had negative experiences with guns. Nothing weird about admitting generalized negative feelings after a specific negative experience. OP isn't leading the movement to rescind women's rights because everyone with a hoo-ha is evil or shouting "ALL MEN ARE PERVERTS!" from the top of a mountain. She's expressing being in a difficult place therapeutically and I can totally relate to it.

OP, I think it's a really awesome start that you have the insight to see prejudices and fears surrounding how you see each gender. Brains are weird and we don't always choose the beliefs we get messaged. But we can choose to change them--and that, I think, is an encouraging thought.

I think I can relate to your situation somewhat--I'm actually quite happy with my male T and the idea of a female T makes me sort of nervous for some reason. I'm often intimidated by other women and sometimes seem to get along better with men generally. How ironic, then, that I sometimes found myself threatened by my T's maleness when we came to a topic that reminded me of it--I'm shy around issues of sexuality and abuse. That sort of thing tends to happen when you're sexually abused (and, yes, I'd consider having a therapist--a figure who is supposed to be safe--admit sexual fantasies about you to be a kind of abuse. It certainly is a mind-f***, anyway)

So who is left for me to talk about these things with? My dog? My god? Nobody--not unless I can brave my own fears and help someone else help me replace my own dysfunctional prejudices with healthier assumptions.

I readily admit it--I had to learn that there were safe males. That doesn't make me a bad person. It makes me a person whose formative experiences led me to believe that males were not safe.

OP, I hope you can talk about this with your T and learn that there are safe male T's. That not all of them are going to see you as a sexual object or turn you into some fantasy slut version of yourself in their heads. Maybe you can talk about how you feel about women, too, and come to appreciate that not all women are going to hurt you, either. I think it'll be a weight off your shoulders when it happens. Best of luck.