Look into the blue or throat chakra. It deals with speaking the truth. There's a great book you should check out called Radical Honesty "how to transform your life by telling the truth"

There are many levels and systems to motivation. Here are some systems you should check out:
-5 love languages
-Myers Briggs
-enneagram
-strengths finder 2.0
-queen,mother, witch, beloved
-learning styles which are why, what, how,what if etc

There is also power, affiliation, and achievement model.

It seems there are high expectations from your husband. Don't try to change him. When we want to change another person, we don't truly love them as they are and wished they were different.

Sometimes your weaknesses lead to strength. Hence the word, vitality.