I did what I planned, to emphasize positive, future things. We had a great time together. He was able to show a smart, funny side that for personal reasons he often hides.

He did stop, I think wondering about the change in tone, try to check in. I told him I was doing it on purpose. He was cool with that and continued the banter back and forth.

Later he said it was really cool to think aloud with me, that I had "Big Heart, Big Mind," a buddhist term. True I've been too generous, but in a selfish world, I'm not sure that this is such a bad thing.

There is still very heavy stuff, but the change was so wonderful, for both of us. We are back on the same page. And I feel the respect for just being who I am, and returned that respect.

He just texted "Amen" not because he is Christian, but that is his code word for "yes, right on, enough said."