My therapist died unexpectedly on Monday and I am not dealing with it very well at all. The one person that could help me is dead. I can call his boss but when I called her last night she didn't seem real thrilled to be hearing from me. I am getting tired of people saying well it was his time to go or Steve would want you to behave this way. I am feeling what I am feeling because that is the way my brain is wired.

I am thinking why trust anyone ever again because they will just leave. Monday night I cut deep enough to have to have stitches yesterday and got a lecture from my GP about it. I am just tired of people and tired of all of this. I came to school today but where I really want to be is home in bed with the covers pulled up over my head and I want Steve to come back. I know that won't happen but its what I want darn it.

I am really having a hard time dealing with this and just need a hug but then again if I got a hug I'd probably just start to cry again.

Jbug