Hi, Scientia. Sure sounds like you’re frustrated, and why not? You write well and sound to me like a pretty smart person. Wish I had a job to offer you but I don’t.
Obviously yours is a difficult situation. But could it be that you’re shooting yourself in the foot, too? By – gee, golly, whiz, what my mother used to say to me, making mountains out of molehills? Or maybe they’re more than molehills but still just hills.
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Originally Posted by ScientiaOmnisEst
. . .I'm a college dropout with no chance of going back. . .
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If you don’t mind my asking. Why no chance of going back? Or, if not now, maybe sometime? What were you studying? What subjects did you like? What subjects, or other activities, were you good at?
Where did you get that idea? Or – another angle – why do you care? What would you like to be doing with your life instead of, well, screwing it up?
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Originally Posted by ScientiaOmnisEst
I'm already involved with a workforce center, they basically gave me a temp job that ended in December. . .
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What did you do there? Did you like it? Did you have a supervisor there or anybody at the workforce center that you might ask about what kind of work they think you would be well-suited for?
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Originally Posted by ScientiaOmnisEst
My guilt seems to be chronic, I don't know what life would be like without it.':/ . . .
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That’s a big one. That may indeed be a mountain that needs to be overcome. Constant foot-shooting.
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Originally Posted by ScientiaOmnisEst
. . .I realize another problem: I'm useless with computers, despite my age (21). I type 30 wpm (or less), and that's with 100-200 errors. . .
So I'm completely useless in any modern setting. I should really stop trying and just give up.
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Now that’s just ridiculous! I used to program computers and it is NOT about typing speed! Do you like knowing how they work? Or graphic design? Maybe not, but those are certainly more important in many technical jobs in a modern setting. Not that you can get one NOW necessarily but to aim for in the future, if that kind of stuff appeals to you.
You’ve written a lot about what’s “wrong” with you but I’m wondering about some of what’s “right”. Again, what do you like to do? What have you done well in the past? Not to brag, but it’s a way to start to looking at how you can use your strengths. Everybody’s got some and I didn’t see where you were writing about them. Except, as I said, your writing itself demonstrates strength in that area. And this comment.
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. . and the only work I've ever done was a very temporary job basically given to me via a youth work program. I mean, I did well there, but it's over now. . .
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Forget that it's over now. Every job ends eventually. What's not to forget, when looking over your good points, is
I know it's tough. I really do. And I'm with Blue Crustacean, seems like you may have a self-hate thing going on there which doesn't help a lot -- that's a tough one, no doubt about it, I know it well, maybe not a subject for this thread, though. Good luck. I wish you the best, and soon!
