Has anyone else experienced psychomotor agitation (or retardation)? Despite is being listed as a criteria in the DSM V there seems to be very little information available about this.

I usually experience this during (mixed)mania or severe depression. It's so very intense. During such times I find myself unfolding and folding up clothes, taking off my clothing and putting it back on, I get so hot and sweat like I was sitting in a sauna for 15 minutes. I become extremely suicidal and I have near zero impulse control. A few times I've come close to jumping off my 16th floor balcony, and I've tried hanging myself many a times (unsuccessfully because it was impulsive and I couldn't find the "right tool" so just used whatever I could).

It's extremely hard to deal with as I cannot take antipsychotics. I take Depakote but it doesn't stop it from happening. I usually take ice cold showers and take a bunch of benzos until I pass out for a couple hours and rinse and repeat. Does anyone else experience this? How do you deal with it?