I feel like I have a lot of fears myself. You have been through so much, it sounds like. So have I. But I feel that I have not had as much. I am getting up there in age myself and alone. My parents have passed away (both seemed to have passed away unpleasantly). And just recently my brother passed away and he was only two years older than me. He died of lung cancer. But he did do an awful lot of smoking and a lot of drinking and drugs. I was surprised that he lived as long as he did (at age 60).

I had cancer (prostate) myself. As of now I'm cancer free. But I would never know what could come up next. I've had a few basel cell skin cancers; and just a few days ago, I had a biopsy for something that looked suspicious. I have not received the results yet, but my mind has been in a whirlwind.

When I had the surgery last year for the prostate, I got the medical bills; and it nearly wiped me out. Fortunately I was able to pay and I have recovered financially a little bit. I have a fear that I could go broke and lose my place. But most of all, I have fears about growing older and having things wrong with me. Especially at being alone. But I do have a lot of paralyzing fears that just exhausts me and sends me into depression.

It seems like to me there's much more cancer going around than there used to be. And other things going wrong. Things are not the way it used to be in this great country of ours. Maybe it's just the end times, who knows?