Thanks everyone - I know I should get out more but right now I feel like a hammer hit me in the head again. I'm so damn vulnerable to a kind word or two and this is sad and dangerous because I get attached with a wink of an eye. I've always felt that I view the world much different than "normal" people. For example, most people can shrug off rejection in a week or two - it takes me months. You think by now I would have the skills to navigate the situation but I don't and it hurts. I also don't have a real good perspective on how women communicate because they seem to be able to spent time with someone and not fall in love - I can't. If she's kind to me and smiles I'm done for - in the real world this is just a real bad trait. I just don't know how to distance myself and stay safe. Okay so now I'm in a recovery period without having any sort of relationship - the worst kind of recovery. I wish I could just be alone and happy - I'm usually pretty good at this but you still have to navigate the real world - that's where I get hurt because I lack experience. Change is hard and I've always been alone - I'll get off now before I sound like a broken record. Sad today☹