I'm taking Gabapentin (Neurontin) 200mg 3× day
Venlafaxine (Effexor) 75mg in morning
Hydroxzine (Vistaril) 50mg 1-2 as needed for anxiety every 4hrs and at bed
Trazadone 50 mg 1-2 at bedtime.

I'm terrified to go back to hospital because she still works there
I'm not out of meds they just aren't working properly. I've only seen a therapist once since I've been out of the hospital and that was an intake appointment. I see him again this wed.I called the place I went to see him and they said they tried calling me to set up an appointment and there wasn't an answering machine. Idk they said they will get ahold of the med clinic and have them call me. I'm hoping soon. I'm just in a mess because I just feel trapped and alone and cannot stand these constantly changing feelings. I know this is not normal thinking I'm having. A lot of the time. I'm not trying to make excuses I'm just scared to be in the hospital again. I refused to go the first two times I went through this in the past. When the alcohol quit "helping" and I just broke down. And no I am not drinking and no I do not want to. I'm just trying to explain. I think I left the hospital the 27th of January.