I don't know for sure.

When you have obsessive needy feelings about your T what do you think of yourself?

I would be prone to feeling ashamed and loserish (that's a word now). I'd feel like I really wanted my T and then I'd default to thinking how embarrassing that is and how much I suck for having these infantile needs and how incongruous it is with the person I try to be and how I hope to be perceived.

I don't know if you have a similar internal dialogue but maybe giving in is just working on feeling okay about having those needs, feeling sadness or grief that they cannot be met fully by your T and not judging yourself for the sadness. Also for me it would mean not being too cool to share those incredibly difficult and (to me) shameful feelings with my T.