So after 10 years i decided that it's enough and i have to try and manage without anti depressents - eased off them this time - the quit now thing really doesnt work lol so went to dr and got how to get off them ...thats done

I remember now one of the reasons i went on them - the mind numbing depression and the anger - depression was still getting through even on the meds so hey ho thought lets give up on them

But this anger...... I am like an explosive device - never know what will trigger me or set me off and I go from 0 to 10,000 in a 12th of a second - and i am even swearing ...hangs my head in shame ..at work ...damn!

I am physically sick at the moment too whcih doesnt help - damn diabeties grrrrr - my own fault though so ...you get what you deserve lol

just venting ....wondering how long it will take my boss who hates me to catch on and fire me .....

when she first came on the scene she asked me to be her eyes and ears on the ward and I said i wouldnt spy for her - things went down hill after that lol

while she has been on a project i have had lots fo weekend shifts - now she is back I have one this month ......not good for my finances

oh and i got another credit card to transfer the balance over on interest free terms but spent on it so now im even more screwed

I knew what i was doing...but its like i step out for a while and then damn! why did i do that....

couple that with losing thigns all the time - my car keys - shoes - uniform - i keep putting them in unusual places .....and i dont remember -

life is fun isnt it

thank you for letting me vent

I saw a kitty at the pet shop today ......made me cry ...still miss my Cisco the wondercat ....oh well poo happens lol