Well my bf always knew I was crazy, I never could hide that from him, and that was maybe 10 years before we started dating.


He finally hauled my butt to a pdoc (read strongly suggested for the sake of my daughter) when I became unhinged and voices were screaming obscenities at me a few months into our relationship.


The dx was no surprise to him, just a confirmation.


His role in our relationship?


He's a bf, a best friend a lover, a confidant, a cheerleader, same like any other partner.


He's not my therapist, or my pdoc, that's just looking for trouble.


The only thing that's different in our relationship, compared to a neurotypical couple, is that in the latter relationship, the partner points out that you have a bad cough that needs attention, whereas my bf will point out if I am heading downhill and this causes me to increase my self-care or discuss something with my T.

Also topics of conversation differ wildly as the things that come out of my mouth are way more entertaining than a non psycho gf.


I try my best to keep the heavier things related to my BP out of my relationship, but there are definitely things I share with him when it's pertinent, and when he's curious about my experiences. The light hearted things (like not sleeping for days and doing washing at 3am) is fun to share though...


He is adamant life is way more interesting loving a crazy lady, and I'm not about to challenge that theory.


Our partners should certainly NEVER be our punching bags.

You wont accept it from someone who doesn't have a mental illness, so you shouldn't be accepting it from someone who does have one. Or two.


My BPD has actually wreaked more havoc in my relationship than my BP, so there's a safe word he says or texts when I'm teetering on the edge of rationality or he senses an explosion coming. He's calm character is very good at diffusing my emotional explosions.


This is when I put myself into MH timeout until I can play nice with others.


So yeah, there's just a different flavour to our relationship, its spicier I guess. But he's certainly not a punching bag, caregiver or a therapist.