If the girl you love is a person who loves you back, she won't leave even though you're going through rough times. If she really loves you, she'll love you unconditionally (meaning pure love towards you, doesn't mean you can treat that person without considering her feelings! cuz that's what a lot of people think "unconditional love" is)

You need to trust her and put trust in that relationship. You're scared you're going to lose everything, but what if you'll gain everything ? You seem to go through a bad case of depression and if you seek help professionally now, it will get better, I promise. You seem to be scared of abandonment and this too can be addressed with a therapist, psychiatrist. Showing the girl you love you're doing everything you can to fix your situation is a proof of love, too !