Puzzclar, glad you posted and reached out. Contact your psychiatrist or therapist and tell them this is an emergency.

You might ask a question you have to the volunteer therapists here. Ask the Therapist

You probably need a safety plan. Here are crisis support numbers
Common Hotline Phone Numbers | Psych Central

Telephone, Hotlines and Help lines | Psych Central

Hang out in chat and see if that helps.