sorry folks this just hit a trigger for my memories of a rather difficult stage of my life - one during which I felt very alone.

But to contribute to the discussion, I do not believe we shouldn't hold either accountable. One may be calculating and think out his/her transgressions ahead of time while the other may be more spontaneous, but they still both KNOW what they are doing is wrong. While neither are likely to show remorse they WILL be very upset at having been caught - proof to me that they knew what they were doing in the first place.

In reference to my earlier post I guess the message I was trying to advance is that we MUST take action - no matter the age - when we see the signs of alarming behaviour significantly marked by a lack of accompanying empathy.