Ceremonies are done, life is somewhat back to normal. Many drinks have been consumed and today I am here. I've come to realize all the pain I carry, the weight of the world measured in hurt. New goal is to rid myself of all the torture, to get what's inside out and allow a normal amount to stay but not the amount I hold onto up to now. I don't think therapy is my fix, it may be up to God to help me through. Will find out starting this Sunday. On the road to becoming more spiritual....... May God grant me peace for the time I have in body and may the devil ease up on me a bit. Thank you all for your hugs and words.