Quote:
Originally Posted by MobiusPsyche
Thank you for your response.
No trauma-related things triggered the initial depression. I think I had been depressed for a while, but there was a worsening when I was 13 or 14 so that's where I put the "start date." Some life events were contributing to the depression then, causing extra stress, but nothing trauma-related.
I've been on synthetic thyroid hormone since age 16. I had a tiny (benign) tumor growing on my pituitary that was causing my hormones to be all out of whack. We were able to shrink that initial tumor through medication, but I still have to take thyroid hormones. I am thinking of switching to Armour thyroid but haven't done so yet.
I'm sorry to hear that you can't afford medications. I've heard several people say that, and it makes me sad and angry; our healthcare system sucks. I'm very fortunate in that a) my job has generous healthcare benefits and b) I've been able to keep my job.
The DBT workbooks are very helpful. I'm not doing full-blown DBT either; I don't do well in group settings because I get so overwhelmed. I started doing mindfulness meditations about five months ago and I'm only now starting to see benefits in terms of my mood being more stable.
I'm doing individual psychotherapy (twice a week) instead, because I prefer that route and because my insurance company will help pay for it. (Fortunate again.)
I've done tons of individual therapy but I was holding back on all but two of the therapists. It definitely does help me to cope better with the depression, though. And for one period I had a boss who was literally The Problem, so it helped to have someone to process what was happening with. I've also taken medications for most of the time since I was diagnosed, antidepressants almost the entire time and some mood stabilizers in there as well occasionally. I find that the medication does not, will not, get rid of the depression but it does allow me to function and get out of bed and go into work when I absolutely have to so I keep taking it. The benefits outweigh the risks for me, at this point in time. The only thing I haven't tried is ECT; saving that for when I really need it, I guess.
I don't see any of these things--psychiatric or physical problems--as a death sentence. I do think that many of them will be with me until I die, but that's different--I guess that's a life sentence, not a death sentence? (Suicide is the obvious exception for me; depression and BPD could literally kill me...someday. Not today.  )
Thank you again for sharing your experience, and for reading about mine. |
Hey again
,
I had problems with anti depressants and mood stabilizers only "half working" too - meaning they only made things "do-able" but not really "good". I was fine with that for a long time because I figured it was better than feeling as bad as I had before, and hey, the risks weren't that bad because I hadn't experienced any of the major ones just the drowsiness n nausea n dizziness n etc - so as long as it made things do-able I was happy. Then I found out natural stuff can have better effects with less side effects. I didn't believe that but, I was frustrated with my docs telling me they had tried me on everything so I had no other options for meds, and with the meds not really helping and the therapists not filling in the gaps where the meds were "falling short" - so I thought I'd give it a try. I started with essential oils. Lavender was the first one I tried - it relaxed me really well whenever I would get really anxious and let me sleelp when I got insomnia and cured my migraines. It really impressed me. So, the next month I ordered more lavender plus two other kinds - rose and cedarwood. Rose is awesome when I get overwhelmed with depression and cedarwood is great if I ever start dissociating. Then I learned exercise releases some of the endorphines in your brain that antidepressants use - so I started walking more. By the way any kind of "human touch" like a hug or etc will do the same. Then my doctor told me I was low on vitamin d which could not only cause me to have more depression but also trigger more seizures. He told me to take 1000 mg vit d daily, also told me the sun is a natural way to get vit d. There are many foods and drinks that can help with depression too. Same things with mood stabilization - vitamins and foods and essential oils for it. Also though - relaxation excercises and coping techniques. And yes, DBT and mindfulness. There are many other natural things - yoga, massage, tai chi, herbs, etc.
Medication can be good, but it comes with risks and your body will eventually develop an immunity to them and then you either have to raise the dosage (making the risks greater) or try a new drug which is always frustrating, so I just thought I'd give you a few ideas. I got a book not too long ago explaining home remedies for many things. I am not sure if it has anything for thyroid, but I can look if you want me to?
I have been in and out of seeing both psychiatrists and counselors now for 16 yrs. with very little imorovement. I have only been learning about the natural methods the past 2 yrs. with noticeable improvement. No matter what you choose it takes a lit of work and determination. It's not something that cannot be done though. I used to think it was. I used to think it was just gonna be a lifelong thing for me and there was no getting out of it. In some ways, I think the mental health system aided me in accepting that belief. I encourage you to try all avenues before you "accept defeat to your illness".
Message me anytime.
Take care!
*hugs*