I'm basing that it's not self sabotaging based upon the fact that you've written that there's no underlying reason to worry where your bf is concerned and that it's not pushing him away.

Past relationships don't always indicate future outcomes. So they are rather difficult to gage the present moment upon.

Hopefully you get it sorted with your therapist and find your inner peace about your relationship. Takes courage and confidence to look at a relationship as something you can survive without, but as a choice in partner and something that you bring just as much to the table as they do. As a person that it would be hard to leave and hard to want to leave.

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