I caved and e-mailed him. This is what I wrote.
We spent years navigating our relationship. 15 years of my life. Breaking it down, you started it with your unsubtle signals. I could get specific but I will spare you. I fell in love, we have a lot of similarities that I really appreciated. It was, for me, an amazing connection and attraction. You validated my feeling that I was a fish out of water. You are cultured, a true global voyager.
Eventually you tired of me.
You did not have the balls to have that conversation with me. It would have been hard, but at least I would have felt respected.
Because you are a narcissist who will never own how the damage of your lies has the potential to leave deep and lifelong scars.
I need to feel sure that you will not victimize another woman.
It may get you off, but for us it is devastating.
I really hope that this is not your pattern. Not that I consider myself special, anything but.
Please resist traumatizing more stupid shits like me.