you can stop reading right now ... just boring personal stuff ...

my "korean crack" saved me from myself before ... maybe the larger dose of lamictal , maybe just my sunny high but been feeling pretty good lately , maybe a little too good if you know what I mean ...

my manic girl at work has stirred feelings that I thought were dead . I had thought meds , but I believe now just between my ears ..

she is calling me back to life ... the only thing that has kept us out of each others pants is schedules ... just no time .. but the lust is boiling ... she is calling and I am hearing ...

33 years of marriage , maybe even my job if we got caught ... and them there's her bf , I calm her and she stirs me , a great pair ...

this is one of the hardest things I have ever had to fight ... and right now my will power is quite low ... if she ever gets a day off ....

I'm back on the "korean crack" I really have nothing else ... I hope sunny can save me from myself one more time ... I'm open to suggestions ... I'm just bouncing from one obsession to another .. maybe pdoc is right and I'm better off depressed .. at least that way I'm too lifeless to do anything ...

oh .. I will be at her work site first thing Monday ... there will be hugging ... hand holding and looking into those eyes ... this is a very busy and public place ... what will we do if ever alone ...

I have never felt such a bond with another ... she needs me .. I know she does ... I need her ...

I'm not sure if obsession is the best thing to ever happen to me or the worst ... save me sunny ...