You are not alone. Phobias are by definition irrational fears. This does not make your feelings of fear any less real or valid! however seemly misproportionate to the object/ situation... In that moment..those intense feelings and anxieties are very real and very scary! As far as coping.. Sounds like you are already doing all you can for now. You are identifying prompting event, acknowledging present internal state, allowing yourself to be afraid while continuing to remind yourself that you will get through and be ok! Remember to breathe and distract with soothing maybe.. for me I have a few smooth stones that I find calming to rub in my hands. fit in a pocket.