Hi Songweaver,
I was very interested to read your post and specially the way you talk about your expereinces with the disorder. You seem very aware, and that you take an active interest.
I also have a disorder, but its not the same as yours.

But I did have an almost identical experience as you when I stumbled on the knowledge, - in few minutes, all my history fell into place and I have been reading and learning since. I have realised how the disorder has been a driving force behind so much of my life, affecting and damaging my relationships and work. I have lost a lot. But having now understood, it all feels somehow more worthwhile.
What I want is that somehow my expereince can benefit others.

I do know how powerful the influence of these things can be. When I'm triggered, its like something takes over and I'm in an altered reality, like a really hidiously bad drug, I get paralysed, obsessed to the point that nothing else even seems alive than that person and my need to go back and fix and put it right and undo the betrayal, real or percieved.

You sound like you are on the path.


riverX