How is it even possible to feel mixed? I don't understand. I need to. I have to. I feel like I'm crazy. I don't see how this is bipolar. It's not the bipolar I know. I don't want to believe I have bipolar. I can't do it. I can't manage this. I can't do it. Why do I feel this way? I don't want to be on meds. I'm scared. I can't stop my mind. I need help. I don't understand.