Visited the psychiatrist again with blood results for Lithium, it's 0.5mg she said take 150mg, I said I'll take 300mg more (900mg total).

I then asked for antidepressant just until it passes..
She reluctantly prescribed SNRI; Venlafaxine xR 75mg.

She tries to convince me to take this Ariply all the time, I refuse, it seems like she's marketing their product and it's mainly for Schizophrenia .. nevermind.
She was reluctant because despite Lithium in the picture, she said I have to be aware so I don't fly UP suddenly. I said I wish I would!

She's very nice, I can speak my mind to her.. my suicidal thoughts and ideation, my low attentive control and clouded thinking.

The only thing I'm afraid of; is that these drugs take a lot of time to work. 2-3 weeks for the SNRI? 2-3 weeks for Li ? jesus...
I can't stop thinking about overdosing on all the pills I got, 30x10mg Ritalin, 30x75mg effexor xr, about 90x300mg Li..
I won't do it but these thoughts are torturing.