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Old Feb 24, 2016, 09:10 AM
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DesigningWoman DesigningWoman is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 280
Quote:
Originally Posted by BloopBleep View Post
Wow, reading this I can relate with a lot of it..
I just started school again after a long hiatus beginning with hospitalization. I too believed things would be different this time around, but it feels just as stressful and unbearable as it used to be.
I can't teach at the pay level I need to survive on (pay rent, etc.) without finishing this degree. So I am marching on. Pretty much everyone in my life keeps reminding me that I don't need all A's and to do every project perfectly. I need the degree. They also remind me frequently that I need to not overwork and keep my stress level as low as possible.
My sis, who has her PhD, came up with this analogy. School is like a gas. It can expand and fill any container quickly and easily, if not contained. Basically, school stress, anxiety, and work time can and will take over your life and you, if you don't set limits on it.
When I got my first Master's degree, I let it completely take over. I worked full time and went to school full time. I got little sleep and was always frantically working. I had zero social life. I was a zombie, stumbling around. I got great grades but at a steep price to me. I made it all the way to the end of the program. I was required to do my Master's Thesis and sit for Comps in the same semester. My thesis was not progressing well. I was panicking, stressed, and miserable. The Comps were a four day grueling process of research and writing insane amounts on each question. Every idea expressed had to have solid citations. Then all comps were closely reviewed for plagiarism. When the comps were released, I sat at my laptop looking at the screen. I totally froze. I couldn't open the test to begin. I hadn't scheduled any time off work. I just couldn't do it to myself. I ended up having to talk to the Department Chair as I shook. I applied and was granted ADA accommodation for an additional semester in which to take comps.
Looking back, I got in such a bad state, because I was pushing far too hard and expecting perfection of myself. I wouldn't let even a little go and suffered for it. In the grand scheme of things, the extra semester meant nothing to my life. I got my degree four months later than I had planned. That program was the gas that filled my life.
I am trying to do better this time around. I am not always successful, but I am trying. It is tough to return to uni after time off. Be kind to and take care of yourself as you contain your school to a manageable size.