Is going into the hospital an option? I'm surprised the Pdoc doesn't have you on seraquel. Lots of us take it. It lets you wind down.
For some it promotes sleep.
Are you alone in your home? Any options there? You live in England right. Do they have out patient centers or visiting nurse plans to help you?

Remember most of us have experienced what you feel. And for some of us much worse. I'm in my late 50's. Been struggling all of my life. First major hospitalization at 19 yrs old.

So we understand. Ask us anything. We are here to help and support. And offer good karma and love.