There is no point of talking to your psychiatrist if you can't be honest with them. If you want the right, proper, and competent treatment it means you have an essential part to play; and if you're not honest with them you won't be helped in the way you need it.

I understand that it's scary, and it's not easy. Maybe look into Dialectal Behavior Therapy if you haven't done so already? I recommend it to everyone, I wish they taught it in schools!