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Thanks for reading my long post. I'm safe, don't worry about me. He did NOT hit me, but this still hurts, his unpredictable outbursts at times. I did say all those things on another thread. I was kind of in denial. Things are normally good for a long period of time aside from him being a little annoying like by not letting me sleep by asking me where the cat is and to tell me to go get the cat.

He'll then reach out to grab the "cat", but he ends up grabbing me instead. I have yelled at him to stop many times, but he is like a bully, relentless. I have insomnia, and he knows that, but he doesn'tcare about that. He thinks that it's funny to do that and get a reaction out of me. He is very immature at times.

I don't really think that I'm in danger, BUT IF I AM, then I'll for sure sleep in my car if I have to! Like I said, all of those shelters are always booked solid! I have nowhere to go. My family lives 7 hours away from me. So does my sister. I don't think that he'll ever hit me as he knows that I'd immediately call the police on him, and I'd tell my parents about it for sure. And my dad would be livid even though he is a sexist control freak pig, I'm still his daughter.

That is why he took my phone, he is scared that I'll take action if he pushes me to far. However, I'm not stupid. I DID leave him for a few days before when things got really bad that one time. I was lucky enough to have a friend who lived nearby who has a big house with lots of room. I no longer have the option of going there thanks to her jerk dad, ugh! Oh, and there is no way in hell that I'd ever move back home. My dad and my mom would drive me insane! My dad has a really bad temper. He's bipolar, a narcissist, and a huge control freak. He's even worse than my husband! My poor mom has nowhere to go, so she's stuck with him. She's super codependent.

I just looked up a ton of counselors in my area and some offer sliding scale payments. I'll find one and go to whoever will cost the least who is also a good fit for me. I'll try to make him pay. If not, I'll take money out of the account for now to pay for it. I'll make sure that he knows it's for counseling since he's driving me insane and hurting me emotionally.

As for work, I'll try to look for work soon, but it's not easy. I have anxiety and issues with depresssion. I'm apparently an introvert, and most places like retail require you to have an outgoing people perosnality. That's not me at all. I used to work in retail, customer service, some waitressing at small places, offices, and fast food. I hated each job, most of my former bosses and some of my co-workerds and customers too.

People can be so mean to you when you're different. I've been bullied, sexually harassed at work, and then fired after two weeks or 3 months for no apparent reason. Not trying to fit in and be everyones friends doesn't help matters. Just being polite isn't enough. I might still try hard to find a night job to avoid dealing with him. He works 6 days a week during the day.

I can maybe do overnight stock at a grocery store if heavy lifting isn't involed. I'm not that strong, and I have a bad back, neck, and shoulder pain.
I have not worked in 16 years, so since a lot of places do background checks, they'll find that out. Who would want to hire someone like me who hasn't been able to keep a job for more than a year? I've quit a few jobs due to not being able to deal with the stress and the people there a few times too. I'd never be able to support myself on miminum wage, even if I worked two jobs. I have bad credit, so getting a new car, my own place, and stuff like that will be next to impossible. I'm a realist. I'd probably not be with him if I could support myself 100%.

He also told me that no one will ever want a crazy person like me. No guy has ever shown much interest in me as a romantic partner expect for the jerks who only seemed to want to have sex with me, ugh! He is very sneaky to. I think that he'd try to hide any money if push came to shove. It'll be tough to get spousal support from him I think. He's a really good liar and manipulator. When the cops came over, the dicks fawned over him and his gun which he showed them. WTH? And they liked the fact that he was in the military. What a bunch of assholes! He didn't threaten to use it on me, but there have been times when he cocked it in front of me. I told him not to of course. I think that he gets off on trying to intimidate me.

Why is he like this? He has had a perfect life, and he's NOT this way with ANYONE but ME! WTH? Thanks for responding.