I think when in such a hard place, thoughts of the "future" are going to be scary, catastrophic and generally unhelpful. Stopping those thoughts is another matter altogether. Many have found mindfulness and focusing on the gifts and blessings we do have (all the senses for example) is helpful.

Nobody is a "total failure"
If anyone thinks that about any others, quite possibly they have severe "difficulties" like severe narcissism for example...

You are helping some people by posting here on PC. You have the courage, insight and honesty to share