Quote:
Originally Posted by BayBrony
I find thus fascinating because I was a preemie AND a twin and I guess I was the quiet twin. There are supposedly "happy" family stories about how I would just entertain myself quietly in my crib for house and hours so my brother needed all the attention. Supposedly I never ever cried so you could just leave me alone for hours....
Then at 3 I was mauled by a dog. I nearly lost my eyes had one whole side of my face ripped up, punctured salivary glands etc so I had all these drains that needed flushing and stuff. It took several adults to hold me down for the flushing and stuff every day for at least a month. Sometime at the end of that period was when my mom tried to drown me for fighting her
I have always wondered how those incidents affected my life.was my mothers complete inability to bond with me related to these things???? She bonded to my brother just fine.
Of course she was nuts and abusive throughout my childhood but my T said what I consider my "normal" childhood experiences like having the wounds flushed was all significantly traumatic which had never ocurred to me
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Velcro. Thank you for the name of the book! I've not heard of that one. My C suggested "Parenting from the Inside Out" to me. Not sure of the author. I got it and tried to read it, but it was so much information that I didn't understand at that time I had to put it down. I may pull it back out and give it another try. There was a good bit about attachment in it too. I just wasn't connecting it to where I was at the time.
BayBrony and Velcro... Your experiences you shared related to attachment make so much sense to me and my heart is sad for them, for you!
My heart is telling me it makes total sense for me too. My mom was never supposed to be able to have children. She tells the story of how she prayed Hannah's prayer and God gave me to her. Then from her stories she still loves to share at family gatherings, I seem to have been the most defiant and rebellious child that she had ever seen. She set about to correct that. Many bad memories.
5 years later, there's my brother. Another blessing she did not expect. She says that God told her when he was born, that she wouldn't have him for very long. Hum... It's 46 years later and he is still the "baby she won't have for long."
It appears that he got the attachment that she was too preoccupied with breaking my defiance to give to me. Ouch!!
That's the first time I've really "said" that.
Not sure what I think about it.
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