i've had different times throughout my life where things have shifted. childhood, i'm not sure how things are. as a teenager, things were very difficult with dissociation pretty much daily for years. i got lost among it all, not 100% blacking out though, but just everything being a confused mess without knowing who i was among the rest.

at a certain time, things stabilized, so it was more just me which allowed me to figure myself out more. but things go up and down, and the last two years or so have been another time where things are more active with others being more active, though that has changed as well. so, for me, it's really up and down. i had several years of being really stable, but now it's kind of not as stable as i used to be so am finding some things more difficult because the confusion is back as well as more dissociation and all that brings with it.