Expectations is really the most potent culprit when it comes to BP, it seems.

Try not to measure yourself by common standards. You won't ever meet them.

However, being you, being special, for better or for worse, you can achieve great things. Maybe just not the things others find relatively easy to achieve or in the ways that others achieve them. Don't rush yourself. Only if you give in and stop fight the depression by trying to meet expectations can the veil lift just enough for you re-organise your thoughts, make plans suited to your abilities (you have them: everyone has them) and slowly (!) work to follow your plan. Let no mania keep you from the course you set out. No distractions, focus! And you will find your way.

You just want to change too bad!

Certainly don't measure yourself by what people post on Facebook. It's mostly as deceptive as any "feel-good" manic episode.