I relate to what you're describing. It's insidious, to the extent that when anyone anytime asks me "what are you gonna DO today," I do the duck and cover. Thinking it, saying IT, will derail any intention or wish. I'll feel distress, and disgust even for that whatever big or small thing. What I'll eat, if I exercise or go out, clean, work on a project, it's so annoying! I feel like I'm just bouncing around randomly, avoiding things, or doing things.

I haven't connected this with bipolar, just thought it is a character flaw, like procrastination. Thanks for a different frame for my pattern of behavior. When I do address it, push back against my inclination, I treat it like something to desensitize myself from, move towards...hard labor, it works.