((((mzsurnage))))),

I am so sorry your parents are struggling to accept you the way you want them to. You did the right thing by refusing to live your life to please them and get married when that is clearly not the kind of lifestyle that would make you happy.

It is understandable that it is so difficult to be dependent on them and have to deal with them showing you so much displeasure because you are not giving into them. At this point, try to do whatever you have to in order to get your residency status back so you can move forward with your life and become independent. You have so much education already, good for you, just keep focusing on moving forward and do your best to come to an inner acceptance that your parents simply do not understand that what they are demanding of you is wrong. Keep in mind that you have learned that once you are in the company of others that can relate to who you are, you do fine. That is important because you should not be considering taking your life or even faking it to convince your parents they need to accept who you are, they simply cannot and you are not alone with that challenge, so many before you have been challenged with that.