Can relate to that. I had worked through early life traumas with a therapist and had a really good time (work, socially, spare time ...) when a new big trauma hit and another after that and still more. When one has to use a lot of energy just to survive, it is very difficult to have the energy to build solid social relationships.

I have friends (a few) but feel that I have to walk on a thight line among them, so that my burdens don't become too heavy for them. Loneliness is part of what keeps the depression going ...