I really wish that I could give a step by step. I have one friend spanning 4 decades, actually another whom I reconnected through their mom of the same length of time. Then there are the friends of over 2 decades and those within the past decade. With busy schedules comes the "no excuses, must commit" to a specific date and time get togethers. It's about making time in these cases. Sometimes it's a jotted note or update. A text. If it takes setting a time and place for coffee, then it's coffee. Right now the onus is on me to establish a dinner, in my home to invite my kids' cousins' family, however the mom and I are the true friends here. Never easy with busy schedules.
I desire reconnecting with one friend an hour away, but at the time(note : excuse making) was going through a real Rocky patch with my ex husband. I want it to happen kid free, as I'm sensitive to her personal situation/being child free.
I've another friend for ages where cards are what works. We've both been to the others weddings. I missed her 40th when I was out of state.

For me friendships develop over time, not forced.

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