You are not trash. The media loves to bash millenials but all generations have been once called useless (Gen x , we were the "slackers")

I work in a corporate environment and believe me those at the top don't do a whole lot but make more than everyone else. They have time to chitchat and walk around w/ a cup of expensive coffee. They all think they deserve where they are today but all I see are spoiled people whom grew up with advantages no one else has. Those are the people that make me sick, not people like you.

Do what you can--it sounds like you are making efforts to get work so don't beat up on yourself. Is there a food pantry near you? You deserve help. You sound tired but motivated--you won't stay where you are for long.