Is it paranoia if most of you thinks that the threat is real, but a part you questions it?

My example -- during my most recent hypomanic state, at the beginning, my pdoc wanted to increase my lamotrigine. I briefly told her that I didn't want to because I was worried she was trying to hurt me with the medicine, that I thought she didn't want me to get well but was experimenting on me, and so was the drug manufacturer and the university where pdoc works.

Unfortunately this was at the very end of the session as pdoc was writing the prescription and reading my chart, so she didn't hear much, and I was hesitant to be more clear with her because I knew it sounded crazy, but mostly I thought it was true.

The next week at my session (my pdoc is also my therapist), I told her what I was afraid of, but that I had read in my journal about the times I was sucidally depressed and how messed up my thinking was and decided to take the lamotrigine.
I told her how my paranoid was last week, saying that most of me thought it was true but my logical part told me it was, but I didn't know what to believe and that I still thought they were trying to harm me.

I struggled with the part of me that logically knew it wasn't true, but this part of me knew it was true. Is that paranoia because I wasn't fully convinced and questioned my beliefs?