Hi candybear,

This is an issue very close to my heart. A few years ago I got into such a mess by doing a co-counselling thing with the friends I had that I just decided to withdraw from the situation. I know that this is a depressive reaction, but also I didn't like the way the relationships were heading. It was like I was playing the truth game, but I couldn't reverse it. I still keep in touch, but only a little, and I tell them that things are OK with me now.

I have since moved to a new town, and I'm meeting some really friendly people. I am super cautious about what I say about myself. If I am really pushed I might say that I am recovering from some ill health, but I don't even like disclosing that much.

It's different on this board, I can say what I like, "the whole truth and nothing but the truth". It's so good. I guess what I am expressing is that I hated turning my friends into therapists, and I don't want to get into that spot again. I guess it's pride. (candybear, I'm not saying you did this, it's just what happened to me).

One thing I do these days, is just smile at people when I'm out walking, and say hello to the neighbours in a friendly way. It's a simple thing, but the response is lovely. Also, when someone is out with a baby or a dog, I often say something complementary. People love it. You know, it can be such a nice world.

A last thing, I go to a healing group where we don't talk, we just meditate together. We don't know what issues there are in the room, we just feel a closeness with each other and sometimes we hold hands. For me, this cuts through the loneliness at a stroke.

I hope I've helped a bit.

Good luck, Myzen