Dear G, I can hardly believe we are done therapy. I know it was time to be done, but I still feel so broken, and I miss you SO MUCH. Maybe that broken feeling won't ever go away. I've felt that way for such a long time - fragile, sad, breakable. I thought you looked sad too, when we were wrapping up our last session. I've never seen your eyes look like that before and I didn't know what to do. I felt emotionless, and I know I had put my wall back up. It was so hard to take down that wall when I first started therapy with you, and then it came down on top of me and I felt so helpless and weak - it's amazing how fast I put up that wall of defence once I knew therapy was coming to an end. I couldn't connect with you at an emotional level anymore. I guess I'm doing okay. It hasn't even been two weeks yet. Last Monday was a REALLY BAD DAY at my new job. I started sobbing as soon as I got to my car, and cried the whole way home, and cried off and on the whole evening even though I tried to distract myself with watching tv. I was so upset that I couldn't fall asleep until after midnight that night. I kept thinking how I wanted to tell you about my bad day, and then I kept realizing over and over again that we are done therapy, and then I started crying all over again. I expect I'll be writing you lots of letters on this forum - letters that I will never send to you and that you will never read. I wish you and I could be friends.