Quote:
Originally Posted by Nickname
Oh, sorry to hear all your hardships. I thought you are at graduate school. Can you go back now and continue if you want to? I am sure there is something that can be done to your credit hours.
I absolutely agree. For me I prefer to be by myself than to chit-chat with others about the everyday life. When I go out and be around people say at the metro station or the mall, I become overwhelmed, and put in the "fight or flight" mode (But this has to do with social anxiety). I also like one-on-one conversations about topics that interest me, which don't interest the majority. Group conversations distract me, and thus I don't involve in them.
To be alone is not easy, but when I think I am good alone, I feel content, but when I think there is something missing in my life, I feel miserable. So, I think it depends on how I view myself when I am alone.
|
I am sorry for the confusion, Nick. I graduated with a master's degree from a three year program, so I am finished with graduate school and have an advanced degree.
I tried online dating and that didn't work very well.
Here is what I think needs to be done. You have very specific goals, such as overcoming social anxiety. I can be alone sometimes and find it can be enjoyable and productive, and it sounds like the same with you. So it is a matter of overcoming whatever obstacles are in the way of goals. That is, to strike a balance, of some enjoyable alone time, but also some enjoyable social time.
I was very successful in graduate school but not so successful with the career, so for me it is back to square one with that.
I expect you are much younger than me. If your goal is to have a relationship then you have to focus, even though it is very hard. Same with friendships, although many friends come and go and that is just a fact of life.
Maybe it is harder in the digital age. Everyone wants the perfect person to be a partner or friend. Or - people don't even work very hard to be nice. So yes, it is difficult.
I think, finally, the key is to be happy with the self. I know that when I am happy everything is easier to do.
As far as social anxiety, I think it is a matter of doing it. That is what Albert Ellis, the founder of what was called REBT (Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy) said.