I stayed up all day yesterday (well, most of it), trying to get my sleep hours back to normal. Anyway, the day was going pretty well, until I called my mother. She had asked me the previous day to call and find out how much the printer she's getting me (an early Christmas present) will be with tax, so I did that. I called her afterwards, and I don't know what happened.

I am attributing at least part of this to her being ill lately, but at the same time, it's like her.

I'm pretty sure she suffers from anxiety, at least in worrying obsessively. I told her when I called, one of the stores told me the very printer I want is on sale (I've since found a second store with the same sale), but the sale ended yesterday. She said, "I think we should wait until [my boyfriend] comes home, don't you?" I didn't see any choice; he's my only transportation to get it. I just called like she'd asked. I told her that, and that I've already talked to him about it and gotten his opinion and information. He works with computers, so she takes him as an expert on all things computer related, but he's not. He told me what he knows of printers.

What's more, I've done a great deal of research, and I know what I want, and have been very careful in choosing. Now, price-wise, I've told her, she could set a price limit, but I wanted to know, so I know in what range to look.

FOR THE RECORD, she wanted to get me a printer when I got my computer--I DID NOT ASK HER FOR IT AT THAT TIME--and I told her no, because my bf was planning on getting one, and I could use that. Things have changed because of my OCD, but also, he's been saying he was going to get one (two, possibly, one for text and a dedicated photo printer) for YEARS, and I am tired of waiting. So, I asked my mom if she still wanted to get me one, and she said yes, so I began researching, and have done so for several weeks. I've learned A LOT about printers, read a great deal of reviews (both by users and editors), gone to CompUSA to get print samples (I tried Best Buy and Circuit City, but neither had machines that were able to print), and I feel I've learned more than enough to make a competent choice. It really insults me that she never values my opinion, no matter how much research I do, and no matter what I know.

I'm at the point that I might just tell her to forget it. The problem is, she won't. She will keep insisting and will not stop!!! She's unbelievable! She'll even get really anxious and start crying. With her health as it is, I'm more worried to upset her, but at the same time, I feel like I never get respect or treated like an adult. I'm always the bad daughter.

Anyway, when I told her my bf has told me that he told me all he knew, she got upset. I don't think she believes that I've talked to him about this. I swear I have. I didn't want to make a decision like this without his input.

She has a hard time communicating what she means sometimes, but takes it out on me because I don't understand. I don't think she treats others like this. She doesn't understand a lot of common and modern terminology, and I don't always know what she's trying to tell me. That's not an excuse for her to get pissed at me.

While on the phone, her yelling at me really got to me, and I told her to hold on, because I was on the verge of hanging up, and I was trying not to do that to her. But I was tearing up badly, ran for tissues and had to calm myself down before getting back on the phone. I told her someone had come to the door, but that was a lie.

I have been really stressed lately, so I didn't need that. It really messed up my day. I haven't called her again since. I just really felt hit hard. I don't think I did anything bad. But I know she has talked to people by now, and probably will talk to others, telling a completely screwed up story of what happened, making me out to be the bad guy. I'm selfish, yes, but she's the one who offered to buy the printer, and I told her I didn't expect her to.