I was laid off work last Thursday and I'm just feeling so depressed and defeated. I've been in the work force for 15 years, and this is the 3rd layoff in a row that I've had to deal with in 4 years! While I'm always given a glowing letter of recommendation after these "down-sizing" events occur, it still batters my self-esteem and I'm stuck right now in a cycle of thought that has me feeling like I'm never going to find another job...ever...again. Most people would say I'm going to be okay. I have experience, an MBA, a nicely built resume...but I'm just feeling so unbelievably overwhelmed and stressed right now. I'm angry that this keeps happening lately, and I'm feeling very hurt, down and sorry for myself. The thought of searching for another job, the interview process...and the thought of simply starting all over again is sometimes too much to think about or bear. I'm tired of being told, "Oh, it'll all work out" or the worst, "You weren't the only person laid off, so just remember that you're not the only one feeling this way." I lost a really good salary and I lost the sense of self/identity that came with my job. To top it off, the last 2 times this happened to me, I landed another job within 2.5 months of being let go. How in the world can I measure up to that timeline, much less achieve that same result, for a THIRD time?! It seems next to impossible! And I truly can't afford to be out of work for long financially because with all the recent job losses, I feel I'm always still digging out of the LAST hole I was in.

I'm just so tired of being 'tested' and I'm tired of being 'strong' and I'm tired of having to 'pick myself up by the boot straps' yet AGAIN. And most of all, I'm just worried that it WON'T work out for once, that it WON'T get better and that I WON'T be better off in the end....and every other cliche that people say to try and help me feel better about this latest life upheaval. I'm just sad. I'm hurt. I'm angry. I'm stressed. I'm scared. I'm defeated. And I'm depressed.