Like RXQueen875 i found out my diagnosis of 'traits of BPD' when i read my medical records. I was appalled as well. But i've recently remembered that really early in my diagnosis 25 years ago i *tried* to get diagnosed BPD and my shrink rejected it and i was really mad. I don't have 'panic re real or imagined abandonment' or unstable relationships, mostly because i don't have *any* relationships. I do have the sense of chronic emptiness, reckless spending when hypo-manic and in the past i had para-suicidal behavior. I can't tolerate the therapy for BPD, dialectical behavior therapy, so it's sort of a moot point. I just get hypo-manic from the long days of activity and stimulation in DBT when i'm so used to being on my own.

I don't really mind how things are now. I'm really inactive but i just have a dog to take care of and i'm up to that so what does it matter if i sleep twelve hours a night and nap all afternoon? I guess i'm wasting my life but having got such a rough start in life i don't really think there's a lot out there for me. I don't think there's a lot of potential for my life. I digress.