Hey barreja... I myself and BP2, a substance abuser too and am just lurking around this area of the forum for a change. I myself wrote a post awhile ago in the relationships and communication section about my issues with women. I'm not sure if it stems from my childhood or what. I've always been intimidated by other women or find them more rude, fake, two faced, at least from my personal experiences. It's made me isolate myself and be more stand offish. I had this job a bit ago that was a office of all women and wow was it hell. I felt picked on because of my anxiety issues (had a panic attack at work) and there was one girl in particular that was downright mean to me. She knows my bf's mom and she quickly started msg'ing her on fb and saying rude things and lies about me. I was appalled at her childish behavior. Unfortunately this is how I find most women to be. It's hindered me from many relationships! And I also just feel uncomfortable around them and think I'm different, or weird, an outsider ect. So I totally get how you feel! Have you tried talking to a therapist about this? Try and figure out where this issue stems from? I myself was raised by my dad and older brother so naturally I am completely fine around men. It's pretty weird. Even with my isolation issues I still have a couple guy friends. You're not alone but I think you should try and figure out what the issue is here and better understand yourself. Good luck hun! You're not alone here!

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